READ TIME: 5 MINUTES | 24 DECEMBER, 2025 | READ ON PHILHSC.COM​

Hi Reader,

Before I sign off for a short break with my family, I just want to say thank you.

Thank you for being here, for reading these emails and for letting me be a small part of your journey.

However you celebrate this time for year, I hope you have a restful, happy, and safe holiday.

Here's this week's essay.

It's the week of Christmas and the world feels unsteady.

The leaders I’ve spoken with are tired. Here in Australia, we're coming to terms with unprecedented antisemitic violence and for many, Christmas can bring with it family conflict, sadness and loneliness. It can be a tough time of year.

There's also an amazing amount of joy and love.

And if you're reading this right now, I know what's probably happening.

Because it happens to me every year.

My brain is trying to pull me away from both the hard and the good.

It wants me to think about next year. To plan, strategise and reflect.

Sometimes it even uses planning as a way to escape the family conversations that grate on me. The awkward silences. The questions I don't want to answer. The tensions that surface every year around this time.

But here's what I want you to hear: Now is not the time.

The trains you've already missed

I think about the immediate time leading up to Christmas like being at a train station.

Trains are scheduled to come and go.

That last "structured reflection train" for the year? It's left the station.

There will be another one. Just not now.

The "planning for next year train"? That one's gone too. It'll come back in January.

You've missed them.

And that's okay.

Because while those trains will return, the moment I'm in right now, this specific Christmas, with these specific people at this specific time won't come back.

I see improvements each year but for a long time my brain had one default settling: I don’t want to be here for it.

My brain wants me to plan. To think three months ahead. Because that feels safer than sitting in the discomfort what's actually happening right now.

Can you relate?

What leadership actually looks like right now

The most important leadership decision you can make this week is to do nothing strategic.

Sometimes it's about being fully present for what's right in front of you.

I see the joy in my wife and children's faces at Christmas. The wonder. The excitement. The memories being created that will stay with them and influence their life.

If I'm thinking about that new market or opportunity, I miss it.

I've had the privilege of providing a place to belong for people who are away from home during Christmas. Creating space where people feel seen and welcomed when they might otherwise feel isolated.

If I'm mentally drafting next year’s strategy, I'm not actually there for them.

I've also learned that taking time for myself (genuinely taking it, not just pretending while my mind runs through scenarios) is healthy.

Essential, even.

If I'm sneaking away to "recharge" but I'm really checking email and planning, I'm lying to myself and everyone around me.

These moments require presence.

Not productivity or ‘one last thing’.

Just being there.

And if you're like me, that's harder than it sounds.

The alternative to presents

​Last week I talked about how to get a true break.

This week, I want you to think about doing things for the people you love that actually make their life simpler and happier.

Not grand gestures. Not expensive gifts. The little things.

The things your family doesn't want to bother you about because they know you're busy and they don't want to add to your load.

Tech support.

Hanging those shelves.

Changing that lightbulb.

Organising the garage.

Fixing the thing that's been broken for months.

The small acts of service that say: "I'm here. Let me take this off your plate."

Here's what I want you to do: Ask the people you love, "What are three things I could do to help this Christmas?"

They might struggle to answer. They're conditioned not to ask. So offer suggestions.

"Should I finally hang those shelves?"

"Want me to help organise the storage room?"

"Can I handle all the tech stuff that's been frustrating you?"

These aren't romantic gestures. They're not Instagram-worthy.

But they matter. Because love isn't just presence. It's also removing friction from someone else's life when you have the capacity to do it.

And right now, you have the time. You just need to stop using it to think about next year.

A hard truth you might need to hear

I know you might be reading this and thinking: "But I need to plan. I need to reflect. I have big decisions to make for 2026."

You do. And you will.

But not now.

Now is the time to rest. To be present. To do the small things that matter.

And if you're struggling with that, if your brain keeps pulling you toward planning, let me be clear: You're not going to do your best thinking right now anyway.

You're tired.

You're at the end of a long year.

Your capacity for strategic thought is lower than you think it is.

The work you do on strategy and reflection when you're exhausted isn't better than the work you'll do in January when you're rested. It's worse.

So cut yourself some slack. Not because you're lazy. But because you're smart enough to know that clarity comes from rest, not from grinding through fatigue.

You know you're good for the work after Christmas. You always have been. You always will be.

Trust that. And let yourself be here now.

What actually matters

There's a phrase I keep coming back to: Contribution and recovery coexist.

But there's another truth that sits alongside it: Presence and leadership coexist.

You don't stop being a leader when you stop planning and executing.

You don't stop contributing when you focus on the people in front of you instead of the strategy for next year.

In fact, some of the most important leadership you'll do this year will happen in the next few days.

At the dinner table.

In the quiet moments when someone needs you to just be there.

That's leadership too. It's just not the kind that gets celebrated in business books.

Right now, it's the kind that matters most.

The bottom line

The world isn't in a good place. You're tired. There's heaviness and there's joy and both are real.

And in the middle of all of it, your brain is going to try to pull you away. To get you to think about next year. To plan and escape into productivity.

Don't let it.

The trains for structured reflection and planning have already left the station.

They'll come back.

But this moment, this Christmas, with these people, won't.

So here's my question for you: What are three things you could do this week that would actually make life simpler and happier for someone you love?

Not grand gestures. Just the little things.

Ask them. Offer suggestions. Then do it.

And when your brain tries to pull you back into 2026, remind yourself: The work will be there in January.

The people in front of you are here now.

Be here with them.

Happy holidays!

​

THE PARTNERSHIP PLAYBOOK PODCAST

Please listen and share it with leaders who think it could help.

EP 149 - 7 min:Holding space for grief. My thoughts on leading in light of the devastating events at Bondi Beach in Australia on 14 December 2025. Listen on ​Apple Podcasts | Spotify​

We’ll return to normal programming on 5 January 2026.

See you next Wednesday,

Phil Hayes-St Clair
Executive Coach

​Find me on LinkedIn​

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